GALLAGHER, Simon Patrick

[Simon Patrick Gallagher]

S I M O N PATRICK G A L L A G H E R !



be careful making wishes in the dark ,

[/i][/color][/size][/font]
d a r k, c a n 't b e s u r e w h e n t h e y 'v e h i t t h e i r m a r k, m a r k. a n d b e s i d e s i n t h e
mean, mean time i'm just dreaming of tearing you apart. i'm in the de-details with the devil[/color][/font]

Full Name:

[/color] Simon Patrick Gallagher
Nicknames: Si (pronounced "Sigh")
Age: 16 (almost 17!)
Birthdate: December 7th, 1996
Sexuality: Pansexual
Gender: Male
Problem: Bipolar 1 (Rapid Cycling)
Grade: Junior
Clique(s): Nerds, Music Geeks
Classes:

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so now the world can never get me ?[/i][/color][/size][/font]
o n m y l e v e l. i j u s t g o t t o g e t y o u o u t o f t h e c a g e. i 'm a y o u n g l o v e r 's r a g e
gonna need a spark to ignite. my songs know what you did in the dark. so light 'em up, up,[/color][/font]

Height:

[/color] 6'0"
Weight: 158 lbs
Hair Color: Dark Blonde to light Brown
Eye Color: Blue
Notable Features: No tattoos, no piercings. Several fine scars on his the insides of his wrists from various aborted suicide attempts. One ugly puckered scar from a serious suicide attempt.
Play-By: Jake Abel
General Description: He's tall and lanky without much muscle, but not lacking in it either. His expression is often serious and he has been told that he needs to smile more often. When he does smile no one seems any better off. When he is manic he is often still unsmiling, though internally he is full of excitement and he feels invincible. But, in the last year or so he's begun smiling more often, almost by accident. When he is manic he seems to physically vibrate with energy, and he can work out until he is near collapse, or alternatively he can do terrible impulsive things to his body. He hasn't gotten a tattoo yet, due to his father's efforts. He dresses in a laid back way. He doesn't follow fashion too closely, but he favours snug fitting jeans because anything baggy looks awful on his thin frame. He once pierced his left ear by himself, but it got infected and so he hasn't tried anything like that since. He likes shirts with collars and occasionally wears v-necks. His eyes are often framed by dark circles because he has trouble sleeping when he is manic and can't seem to do anything except sleep when he is depressed.[/justify][/blockquote][/size]


up light 'em up up up. light 'em up ,[/i][/color][/size][/font]
u p, u p. i ' m o n f i r e. s o l i g h t 'e m u p, u p, u p. l i g h t 'e m u p, u p, u p. l i g h t 'e m u p, u p,
up. i'm on fire. in the dark, dark. in the dark, dark. all the writers keep writing[/color][/font]

Likes:

[/color]

-The Cello. The sound, the feeling of the strings vibrating beneath his fingers--- everything about the cello soothes him. He find spiritual, mental, emotional, whatever-al release from playing the cello. He's also tried his hand at piano, but didn't feel the same connection to the instrument. He also plays a bit of guitar, but only enough to accompany himself when he is singing. He does like old folk songs, since they are usually simple to play and he doesn't need to think about the accompaniment so much.

-Singing. He used to sing himself to sleep when he was lonely as a small child, and his love of singing has never truly gone. He has a pretty good singing voice. It's not heartbreaking, gorgeous, phenomenal or whatever; it's just sincere and emotional. His voice is sort of soft and not rich like the voices he admires. It's sort of breathy and “pretty”, which irritates him to no end. He can't listen to recordings of his own singing because of this. But, some people like it.

-Classical Music and Jazz. He finds it mentally stimulating and emotionally cathartic to listen to good music. Not to say that he doesn't think other non-classical or jazz music isn't 'good' but he wouldn't listen to rap music for his own enjoyment.

-Books, especially novels. He loves the escapist value of a good fiction. He tries to stray away from the more depressing and autobiographical stories since they can trigger his depression. He likes fantasy and science fiction, but plain old fiction suits him fine.

-Improv Comedy. Before he came to St. Helena's he was in the Improv Club at his school, and he was quite good at it. He loves how improv makes you think on your feet and can often leave you rolling on the floor.

-Doing normal, fun, silly things that teenagers do. He wasn't able to do "normal" things until he came to a school for people who were anything but normal. He finds great satisfaction now in doing things as simple as hanging out with some friends and doing nothing at all.

Dislikes:

-His Stepmother. To put it mildly, she is a manipulative, sadistic, heartless, and unrepentant b-i-t-c-h. She has a creative and cruel eye for punishment. She used to beat him with a horse whip for the slightest infractions and often left him bruised and bloodied, only to blame his injuries on 'fights' Simon supposedly got in with his step-siblings, whenever a worried adult caught a glimpse of the bruises. She used to lock Simon in his room for days at a time without meals when he displeased her. He once had to be hospitalized when she withheld food for too long. And, since he had a history of serious 'mental disturbances' the doctor believed her when she said that Simon had been starving himself despite her efforts to feed him.

-His Step-siblings. Guess who never sneaked him food when he was starving? Guess who never spoke up when he was being abused? Guess who laughed when he cried out in pain? Guess who got to help Mommy punish the bad egg? Guess who enjoyed it? Yeah, that's enough guessing: it was the Patterson brood. They also went out of their way to get him into trouble. If one of them broke something in the house, they all banded together to blame it on Simon.

-Medications. He's been on so many different medications in his lifetime, it makes him a little sick just thinking about it. He's been on every different combination of various mood stabilizers and anti-depressants imaginable. All they seem to do is put him into a sort of fog. There was a time when he really believed that some combination of pills would work, and he'd wake up like a normal person. But, he's been disappointed so many times, he's come to hate the pills. However, he has been better about taking medications recently.

-School (This used to be an issue, but it is NOT an issue now). That's kind of a given. He didn't ask to be sent to the “Loony School”. He could at least find a moment away from the misery of his condition when he was in Chamber Orchestra or Chamber Choir at school before St. Helena's. At least when he was in “Normal School” he could pretend he was a normal person. Sometimes he could even pretend he was going somewhere in life when he saw that he was coming out on top in all of his advanced placement classes. Even when it got to the point where he was missing more school than he was attending and his grades were beginning to slip, he could honestly say that there were people who thought he had potential. Even if it was wasted potential.

-Being Alive (Not as much of an issue as it used to be). This is kind of a big one, I guess. It isn't like this all the time. Sometimes, when he's manic, everything is fucking beautiful and he could do anything and he would enjoy it. When he's manic life is the best thing ever and death is just another adventure. But, when he starts to come down from his happy high he wants to escape (die) before he can get low again. He wants to die happy, so amid the dizzying brightness of his manic moods he is always a bit suicidal. Coming down from a manic mood is terrifying and possibly more upsetting than being depressed, because it is all just slipping. There is nothing worse than that.

-Crickets. They keep him up at night.

Strengths:

-Intelligence. He has a very high IQ. He loves learning. He actually likes studying. You'd think this would set him up for some great academic success but, no, it really doesn't work that way. When he gets into a manic mood he is often so unfocused that his brilliance just falls all around him and is never put into the right place. When he is depressed he doesn't want to think, but he still does and it hurts. He used to get a lot of things done, but the chemicals in his brain have been changing as he matures, and the mood swings have become more violent than ever. His baseline mood is now always slightly depressed, and mania throws him all out of whack when it comes.

-Talent as a Cellist. He devotes much of his time to the cello, and he was first chair in Advanced Orchestra as well as first chair in Chamber Orchestra at his old school. He was probably one of the best in the state, but his mental instability made it difficult for him to continue performing towards the end of his life 'before' St. Helena's. He could have gone to Juilliard with his talent, but he blew it, didn't he?

-Studiousness. Yes, he's a good student, or at least he was before mania and depression took over his life completely. Even now he finds time to complete his coursework and still participate in music.

-This was not a strength at first, but in the last year or so he has become less of a downer and more of a supporter. He got support from other people when he first got to St. Helena's and still gets help when he needs it, so being a supportive person (especially to new students) is his way of giving back. He's a loyal friend and a good listener.

Weaknesses:

-Extreme Negativity (though this has become less of an issue). When he is depressed doesn't see the glass half-full. He doesn't see the glass half-empty. He sees the glass is riddled with lead particles and smashed all over the ground.

-Impulsive behaviour. This is especially true when he is manic. He does stupid things and doesn't really think about the consequences. Even when he does think about the consequences they don't seem to matter any more. When he is at the mercy of his impulse he is liable to do things like: attempting suicide, trying crystal meth, getting a face tattoo, carving a word into his skin with a razor blade, joining the circus, pissing off the Mafia to see what will happen--- not to say that he's done most of these things, but that's how far he would go.

-Compulsive Lying (he has made a HUGE improvement here). He was abused. Like many abused kids, who don't even realize they are doing this much of the time, he tends to lie without reason. It all stems from a coping mechanism developed in childhood. The unconscious logic behind it was “If I tell my step mother that my teacher said I did excellent work and I played chess with the good kids today, then she is less likely to accuse me of smoking crack and being a bad influence.”, and it just kind of stuck, even in situations where lying gave him no advantage. Like, if he is meeting a complete stranger that he will probably never see again on the bus, he will tell them that he is in a rock-band and has a girlfriend with tattoos and bleach blonde hair, and his best friend is related to the drummer from Metallica--- for no reason other than habit.

-Emotional Volatility due to bipolar disorder, though it isn't external rage so much as it's extreme unhappiness or rage directed at himself.

-Sometimes he still gets so depressed that he becomes almost catatonic. It doesn't happen as often as it used to, but when it does happen he can't do anything at all. Fortunately, it rarely lasts more than a few days.


Fears:

-Coming down from a happy high. This terrifies him more than anything, and he has to face it all the time.

-Becoming depressed one day and never being happy again.

-His Stepmother. Even now that there is no physical way she could hurt him, she still scares him, or maybe it's just what she represents in his life that he fears.

-Failure.

-Loneliness.

-Boredom.

-Becoming completely numb from a medication that DOES work. This is a little complicated, because as much as he wants to be 'cured', he would hate to be completely deprived of his emotions. He doesn't want to be a zombie.

-Being trapped in his own mind forever.

-Everything. Sometimes he has panic attacks and he is afraid of everything--- people, being alone, being indoors, being outdoors, light, dark, etc. He often has multiple contradicting fears at once when he has one of these panic attacks.


Disorders: Bipolar 1, with rapid cycling and one or two psychotic episodes. Borderline case of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. Generalized Anxiety Disorder. Possibly abuse triggered Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. History of self-injury, suicidal ideation, and suicide attempts. All other disorders are rooted in his severe bipolar disorder, however.
General Description: He has rapid cycling bipolar disorder--- so rapid that sometimes he can have polar shifts in his mood within a day. He's more prone to self-destructive behaviour when he is manic than when he is depressed, as strange as that might sound. He has a generally negative outlook on life. He's attempted suicide more than once and cognitive therapy and medication haven't done much to convince him that life is worth living. He resents the fact that he has been sent away to school, and he hates his family. He's been playing the cello since he was five, and that is the only thing that feels like a constant in his life. He finds comfort and peace in music, but when he is depressed he sometimes can't find the energy to get up and play, even when he knows it will make him feel better. He has really severe panic attacks sometimes, due to his bipolar cycles. Since coming to St. Helena's (getting away from home) he has actually shown a marked improvement. He seems less negative now that he's out of his step-mother's influence. When he first arrived he had trouble, but then he started getting involved in class and actually made some friends. He's really a different person from the shell of a human being he was when he was first sent to St. Helena's. He's gone from being completely unable to function to just a stone's throw away from what would be considered "normal".[/justify][/blockquote][/size]


what they write, write. somewhere ,[/i][/color][/size][/font]
a n o t h er p r e t t y v e i n j u s t d i e d. i 'v e g o t t h e s c a r s f r o m t o m o r r o w a n d, i
wish you could see, see that you’re the antidote to everything except for me, me[/color][/font]

Mother:

[/color] June Wallace, biological mother, 42
Carolyn Gallagher, step-mother, 46
Father: James Gallagher, 58
Siblings:
-Emily Patterson, step-sister, 23
-Jonah Patterson, step-brother, 19
-David Patterson, step-brother, 17
-Christina Patterson, step-sister, 16
-Amy Gallagher, half-sister, 8
History:

His parents divorced when he was two and his mother ran off to follow her dreams of becoming a travelling food critic. He hasn't seen his mother since he was five. His father remarried when Simon was seven, bringing a cruel stepmother and cruel step-siblings into Simon's life. He was bullied in school for being a nerd and bullied at home for just being alive. When he was ten, his step-brother, Jonah pushed him out into traffic and he was hit by a car. This resulted in several broken limbs and a lecture from his stepmother about watching where you are going before you cross the street. No one believed him when he said he was pushed, and he was punished for 'lying'.

When he was eleven he attempted suicide by hanging in his closet, but he didn't get far since his step-mother had taken away his bedroom door out of distrust and his step sister, Emily walked in on him. When he was fourteen he attempted suicide several times--- two of those times he did it by slitting his wrists with a box cutter and another time by swallowing an entire bottle of children's Tylenol. He was lectured and punished for 'tearing the family apart', though he knew that none of his step siblings would mind if he was gone, and his stepmother might even enjoy burying him. The last time he attempted that year he slit his wrists deep enough that it was actually touch and go for a while, and his stepmother finally convinced his father that they couldn't have him around the house any longer. That was how he ended up at St. Helena's at the age of fourteen.

He's really grown a lot as a person since coming to St. Helena's. His panic attacks happen with far less frequency, and he's been able to open up to some of the staff. He doesn't have as much trouble socializing as he did at first, and he hasn't had serious thoughts about suicide for an entire year. He's got a 4.0 GPA. He's joined some clubs. If it wasn't for the fact that he is still plagued by terrible mood swings he'd probably be able to function in normal society. Beyond that, he no longer has any desire to "escape" from St. Helena's. He's found that he actually quite likes it at the school, though he hated it with a passion to begin with, since it is the only place where he doesn't feel judged for his disorder. He now has hopes of living a productive life some day and maybe even doing something to help remove the stigma from mental health issues.

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a constellation of tears on your lashes ,[/i][/color][/size][/font]
b u r n e v e r y t h i n g y o u l o v e, t h e n b u r n t h e a s h e s. i n t h e e n d e v e r y t h i n g
collides. my childhood spat back out the monster that you see. my songs know what you did in the dark.[/color][/font]

Alias:

[/color] Simon
Age: 18
Time Zone: Pacific
Other Characters: None (well, just until I've finished this other charrie I'm working on.)
Code Words: -LIIIIIIIICKED BY ALICE-[/justify][/blockquote][/size]


this template was made by alice. it uses the lyrics
for "my songs know what you did in the dark (light 'em up)"
by fall out boy. do not steal, alter, edit, or use without her
permission or she will send the evil monkey in her closet
after you. you have been warned.[/i][/center]

[ALICE IN WONDERLAND]

A C C E P T E D !

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please post in all claims. stay active, and have fun!

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